💥Atomic Essays

Short-form lightly edited, lightly structured essays, written in 30 minutes.
Published on:
February 11, 2024

💀 The Time I Thought I Was Facing Death in 2022

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Less than a year ago, in the middle of the night, I jolted awake, gripped by a pain that tore me from my sleep. Suspecting the onset of menstruation, I reached for the last two Advils in my closet and brewed a soothing cup of ginger tea. After a struggle, I managed to return to bed and drift back into sleep. I initially dismissed this as routine menstruation discomfort or a small change in my cycle.

Then, every single person's worst nightmare happened… the unthinkable struck – a second awakening, around 3 am, a surge of pain disrupted my sleep, this time with agonizing pain that rendered me nearly immobile for the next 5 to 6 hours. Every move sent waves of pain through my entire body.

I felt pain all throughout my body. My eyesight was blurry. My toes and fingertips felt numb. It felt as though I were being continuously tazed and stabbed at the same time. However, the epicenter of the pain was my pelvic area. In the initial two hours, the intensity was so overwhelming that I started losing consciousness. I only remember crying and calling for help. At one point, I passed out from the pain. I knew of the sequence of time from the time on my Fitbit.

Upon regaining consciousness, the journey to retrieve my cell phone from the living room seemed insurmountable. After much desperation, cries, and yelling for help that echoed into an abyss, I had an intensifying fear that, I would pass out again. That this was the end, and it would take many days for anyone to discover my lifeless body on the floor face down, reaching for help.

Gradually, the pain began to subside, allowing me to crawl to the bathroom. I settled into the bathtub, turning on the hot water. Crying, not understanding what was happening to me. I lay there waiting for the heat to ease the pain. Eventually, it did just that, sufficiently enough for me to move around again. Eventually, my muscles and the pain became relaxed enough for me to access my cell phone.

Fast forward, I managed to reach the doctor and underwent an examination. I was then met with multiple misunderstandings and misdiagnoses. I've had endometriosis, but this one doctor I've seen for a while kept convincing me it was a hernia.

Eventually, after seeing two doctors, and a specialist. It had been concluded as I suspected, this was a combination of endometriosis, and uterine prolapse – not my first, but unquestionably the most excruciating. There are still some symptoms that are unexplainable. Since that horrific day, I've had many similar episodes before, during, or after my menstrual cycle.

Reflecting on this harrowing incident, I knew I couldn't risk being caught off guard again. I knew I would never want another day of my life, lying on the floor screaming for help. The realization led me to ask, how could I prevent this from happening again, or lessen the chances of me lying on the floor with no one to call for help.

If you have had a similar experience, and see this possibly happening in the future for you, I advise you to please check out my emergency menstruation kit. It can help with issues beyond menstruation, such as episodes of severe endometriosis.

From this experience, I realized I could never again be in a position like this, and brainstormed how it could have been handled better. I once heard that some pregnant women have emergency birth kits, and I thought this could apply perfectly to my situation.

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